“When you let go, you create space for better things.” Unknown

“I wear life like a loose dress” was a favorite saying of my friend.  

She left space for a breeze between herself and her people. She lived spontaneously. Held life lightly.

Being a hippie at heart, I imagined dancing with people barefoot, wearing peace signs and long flowing tie dyed dresses, and hugging everyone freely. 

In reality, though, I was more of a cling-on than a free spirit. I wanted to apply what she said to my relationships, but I didn’t know how.

I didn’t allow people space because they might leave and not return. Her quote helped reduce my chances of emotionally suffocating people and relax my ideas about what togetherness meant. She gave me something to cling to besides people – the idea of wearing my relationships like a loose dress. I added deep breathing. 

The first time I asked for space from another person, I felt sick afterwards. I wanted to call back and say, “I don’t want space after all. You can come back now.” 

Before I picked up the phone, though, I felt sicker thinking about not having space. It was one of those moments like I wrote about yesterday. I had to “do it uncomfortable.”

I learned to appreciate the goodness of space for others and for myself. Space keeps relationships wholesome and balanced and easy to be in. 

How do you deal with space in your relationships? 

In This Together,
Kim